Enjoy and Cherish This Season- From a Frazzled and Fragile Mom

  Most days I feel constantly needed.  I can’t remember what its like to get a good night’s sleep or use the bathroom without being interrupted. 

  I spend what feels like ¾ of my day in the kitchen stuck on repeat  in the mad cycle of making meals and doing dishes.   I am continually picking up the house and don’t own nice things anymore.

 I don’t know what it’s like to sit through an entire meal. 

 If I am putting on make up or heaven forbid,  real pants, my children do a happy dance because that means an outing is about to unfold.  

I answer to an endless string of “Mommy” this and “Mommy” that. I am a pro at breaking up fights and coming up with consequences.  

 The bathroom is now referred to as the potty  and I  can say with certainly that I have visited every public “potty” in the entire city.

I have a husband and friends although I rarely have time for them anymore and when I do they get my leftovers.  

And then those words are spoken by a loving, well intending person… the bombshell….

“Enjoy and cherish your kids at this age- they grow up too fast.”   I can’t even begin to count how many times those words of advice have been shared with me since entering this thing called Motherhood.

However, each time I hear this message, my heart sinks a little further because this season  of life has been emotionally draining, physically exhausting, and has taken a toll on my identity.  Truth be told, this season is hard and  most of the time I wouldn’t use the word “enjoyable” to describe it.  Being told to “enjoy this time” makes me feel a profound sense of fresh failure closely followed by guilt and finally regret.   All I hear is “you are doing it all wrong.” And the tears easily flow.  

These words catch me in the midst of a tough season where I am already frazzled and fragile.  

Don’t get me wrong.  I LOVE my kids and wouldn’t trade any of this for the world.  

There is so much good.  So much laughter.   An unknown depth of love.

This season is special and it is refining me…. And I ultimately want that.  I want to be a woman who is changed from the inside out.  I want to be someone of depth who is motivated out of a spirit of love.  Not fear.  Not guilt.   But I don’t have to “enjoy” it.... not now at least.  Maybe that enjoyment that so many fondly reminisce will come with time, as the fruits of this season overshadow the difficulty.  

As the years pass I wonder what I will say to those in my shoes now.  I hope I use words of encouragement….. “hang in there….it gets easier…  how can I be praying for you through this?....”  

Or maybe,  it will be the same words spoken to me….to enjoy, love and cherish this season.  

Can a person really know the full extent of a season of life while in the midst of it?

 

    What well intended advice have you been given that felt overwhelming at the time?