Thankfulness

In many ways, life has exceeded my expectations.  I am married to an amazing man and have three beautiful healthy children who I am able to stay home with.  We have vehicles that run, a pantry that is never empty, and a toy box that overflows.   Our needs are met ten times over and honestly, so are most of our wants.  We have beautiful relationships and friendships in our lives.  We have a storehouse full of memories that when called upon, will always bring a smile. 

 I am living the dream, the dream I scribbled in my junior high diaries.  I should be overflowing with thankfulness and joy- meeting everyday with wonder and an all-out goofy, wide eyed grin.  

But I don’t.  Most days I forget.  Often I grumble.

Being thankful, despite my circumstances, just doesn’t come naturally.  

A few years ago my Mom gave me the book One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp.  Along with the book she also gave me a notebook to attempt the author’s challenge of keeping an actual list of thankfulness-  to recapture the wonder of life’s simple moments.   The goal was to make it to 1,000.  That seemed like a lofty number but my list-making, goal achieving self had been set into motion and couldn’t be stopped.

December 2, 2014 I began my list with….. "1. Steel Cut Oatmeal" and about a year in a half later, on June 13, 2016 finished with "1,000. Summer School."

A lot has happened over that span of time from mountain top moments to difficult valleys.  I wish I could tell you that 1,000 reasons of thankfulness later my heart bends more towards thankfulness but that isn’t always the case. I believe that seeing the good and being thankful is a constant daily choice that has the power to shift perspective and the ability to lead to joy.  

So I have continued my list of blessings, this time not out of sheer determination, but out of habit.  It changes me on the days I pause to notice the good.  The good that is always there whether acknowledged or not.  Simply waiting to be noticed. 

“Gratitude bestows reverence, allowing us to encounter everyday epiphanies, those transcendent moments of awe that change forever how we experience life and the world.”  - Sarah Ban Breathnach